one year

It really is amazing what a difference one year can make! 

It was nearly one year ago that my baby stopped sleeping in her baby crib.

It was nearly one year ago that my girl had some scary health issues that landed us in the CHOA ER not once but twice in a matter of weeks.

It was nearly one year ago that we (more me than we but that's another post for another day anyway...) decided I would take a "part time", short term job.

It's been just over a year since my hubby had his first ever surgery.

It's been nearly a year since I was introduced to Jen Hatmaker.  (not literally... just her books and way of thinking...  I did actually meet her this past September... and I ugly cried... not my proudest moment.)

It's been about a year since I started listening to that whisper in my heart.  God was trying to get my attention.  It took about a year.  I'm hard headed.  :-)

My word for this year - wait - comes after a year of running... even racing... toward what I thought was right and good.

My intentions were well meaning but it was still I and ME instead of Him. 

Learning to lean into His will daily is difficult for this planner.  I like a full calendar of events and plans and To Do's but I'm learning that slowing down in order to listen... that's most important. 

"But what if God's will was never intended to be found?  In fact, what if it was never hidden from us in the first place?  What if God the Father has not sent his children on a cosmic Easter egg hunt to discover his will while he sits back in heaven saying, 'You're getting colder... warmer... colder...'?  And what if searching for God's will like this actually misses the entire point of what it means to be a disciple of Jesus?"

from Follow Me by David Platt

 

I think this is what my waiting looks like this year... becoming more a disciple of Jesus and less Easter egg hunting for "God's will".

 

So, more of HIM... less of me... and in this time of waiting, I will choose His will daily... die to self...  love others... serve others...

 

"I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word."  Luke 1:38